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| After Sarah's encouragement, we have many testimonies from young ladies and homeschooling moms who are "dresses only"!
Encouragement from Sarah
“In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array” (1 Timothy 2:9).
In our society, modesty is a subject that is rarely discussed or broached. What some people consider modest is not modest at all! So, what IS modest? As a godly Christian girl how are you dressing? The Lord led us to wearing dresses (when say dresses throughout this article, I'm also referring to jumpers and skirts!) only when I was about ten or so. At first, I was just wearing dresses because my parents wanted me to. But, as I grew older, my love for wearing dresses increased as did my desire to not defraud men with what I wore. Now, the conviction that my parents’ had for me has been replaced with my own conviction to dress modestly.
Another reason we wear dresses is to appear distinctly feminine. Compare a girl wearing pants to a girl wearing a dress! Who looks more feminine? Clearly it’s the girl in a dress! We know some like to think that they have cute feminine pants, but pants are still men’s clothing in our day. We have several reasons why I wear dresses only. The main reason is not to defraud men with the way I dress. If a lady wears pants, a man’s eyes are drawn to a part of her body they should not be drawn to. This can cause a man to have impure thoughts. The same thing with tight, revealing tops or low-necked blouses. We have heard some say, “But he is responsible for his thoughts!” Yes, that is true, but it is also our responsibility as a godly woman to dress in a way that would not provoke those thoughts. Would you be willing to deny yourself the “pleasure” of dressing the way you want to help a brother in Christ? “Wherefore, if meat make my brother to offend, I will eat no flesh while the world standeth, lest I make my brother to offend” (1 Corinthians 8:13). We could paraphrase it and say, “If a certain type of clothing make my brother to offend, I will not dress that way…” We would encourage you that it is important even if you are wearing dresses to have specific standards. Just because a girl wears a dress does not mean she is modest. From our experience, there are more immodest dresses available in the stores than there are modest ones. I prefer my dresses to be ankle length. I do not wear spandex type material in dresses, skirts, or jumpers because it is very clingy. I avoid slits in skirts (we sew them up :-)) because it draws a man’s eyes to a woman’s legs and creates a peek-a-boo effect. I do not wear low-necked shirts, blouses, or dresses but rather ones that are at the collarbone or above. I personally do not wear sleeveless shirts. When looking at someone wearing a sleeveless blouse, where are your eyes drawn? Most sleeveless shirts are loose around the armholes, therefore showing even undergarments much of the time. Please, I encourage you, re-evaluate if you are wearing sleeveless things. My brothers and Dad go to an inner city homeless mission each month. A while ago, another church showed up to help with the service. They arrived late, and a woman was along with them. She was immodestly dressed, and as she walked down the aisle to sit near the platform, my brothers observed that the men about fell over watching her. I would encourage you to run your outfits by at least your Dad, and maybe even your brothers. Since they are men, they will be able to evaluate clothing and see anything that might be immodest. I can do virtually anything in a jumper that one can do in pants or shorts - including exercising! In fact, I walk three miles per day with at least one of my brothers or sister, and part of that is on a semi-busy road. One morning, I decided to count how many cars we saw on that 30 minute section, and can you believe it was around 250 cars?!! That would mean around 500 people see us every morning, modestly dressed while exercising. That in itself is a testimony! I know from comments we’ve heard that people definitely notice us. One time, my younger brothers and sisters and I walked to a gas station to get a treat. Someone held the door open for us and said something like, “Oh, so you’re the walkers we see every morning!” They felt like they knew us just because they saw us. We have also had people comment on how happy we look. May Jesus Christ be praised! If you feel you can’t do something in a dress, I would encourage you to question whether it is an activity that you can do and be feminine. I pray that this article is an encouragement to you, and that you will re-evaluate your clothing choices. In closing, I strongly encourage Dr. S.M. Davis’ tape on, “The Language of the Christian’s Clothing.” It is $8 for two CDs, and I think you will be blessed. You can also check out our Modest Dress Resource page for hints on where to buy modest clothes. Joyfully His, Sarah Maxwell
Testimonies from young ladies
who are dresses only
To answer your first question, I'm *very* active in my skirts! :) I love the outdoors. Some outdoor activities I've learned to do in a skirt include: hiking (in the mountains - just beautiful!), wading in our creek, driving four-wheelers, jumping on the trampoline, and playing running games with my siblings and friends. I wear ankle-length or slightly higher skirts, and ones that are quite full, because I've found it's easiest that way.
For town or indoors, I like straighter, narrower skirts - more of a "sporty" style, you might say. When I'm buying or making clothes, I ask myself three questions: 1), Will this be modest? 2), Is this distinctly feminine? 3), Will this item attract undue attention? My answer as to why I wear dresses only has changed over time. At first, I would have answered, "Because that's modest." But here are the reasons that God has placed on my heart: 1) I've found that the way I dress directly affects my spirit. It is so much easier to have a quiet, meek spirit when I'm wearing a skirt or dress. I think this is related to the second reason... 2) Because it's feminine! God created us as young women, and it's something we should be excited about! When I'm wearing a skirt or dress, I truly feel like a lady. 3) Yes, I do believe that it's the most modest way for me to dress. A friend of mine once told me that when she is deciding over her clothing, she asks herself, "Will this cause my brothers in Christ to fall or be tempted?" I think that's a wonderful way to look at it. I hope this has been of some help to you! Oh, and about mowing the lawn, try wearing a fuller skirt with lighter fabric. Even though they aren't real stylish now, full skirts are much more practical for home work! A young lady Too be honest with you girls I have just quit wearing pants within the last month. I guess my top too reasons are because I strongly feel that this is what God is asking me to do, and I feel beautiful in them, I feel like a lady. A young woman of God, which is what I am working on being on the inside, and its starting to show on the outside. A young lady Want to send us your testimony? Click here to e-mail us!
You're not alone! Testimonies from homeschooling moms!
We compiled some testimonies from one of our message boards for homeschooling moms. We hope this will encourage you!
I will share my story with you.
Preface: I grew up in a christian home & came to Christ very early but everything seemed to come from a view through world colored glasses. Well, the Lord gave me all girls - I have three & they are now three. After the first year of many, many, many diapers & scheduling & the like I came up for air to the terrifying reality that God has given me daughters to raise to be godly women!!! There I began my quest. I searched the Word over to find just what God would have me do. I began asking a few chosen Titus 2 friends who I knew to be modeling biblical womanhood to their daughters. An issue I never expected to be apart of this quest was my outward appearance. Except for a few years of total rebellion & running from God, I have always thought myself to be a modest dresser (albeit very stylish). I have always been a tomboy so I had never embraced my femininity. I have always been proud (& always encouraged) to be able to keep up with the men in just about everything from climbing trees for fun to climbing the roof for repairs to climbing the corporate ladder. I have actually been proud of my figure & it has always gotten me attention. Then, I stumbled across an article that astounded me! I dug & dug into the word & studied it like never before (plus listened to the SM Davis tape w/dh & he, too was astounded). I could not believe that I had never fully understood this subject before! I was mortified to think how I felt I had grieved the Lord on this for so long. The decision to follow the Word with my outward appearance was very, very simple. I just wanted to please my Heavenly Father! So, out went every pair of pants & on went the few dresses that I owned (I had worn them occasionally), cold turkey (my girls wardrobe, too). It has been six months & I now look at how I dress as a joyful act of worship (& way to honor my dh). Dresses are actually far more comfortable than any waist binding, bottom pinching, constricting pants ever can be. Not that I wore skin tight pants, mind you, but, lets face facts, jeans just snug you in all over. I feel pretty liberated by this, as silly as that may sound. So, needless to say, my trek & this issue, in particular, have brought to light some subtle, but very ungodly areas in my life. I am pressing into the Lord more strongly each day, seeking His forgiveness & His help to press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Hallelujah, what a Savior! Has anyone asked me about wearing only dresses? Only one person - my SIL & I wasn't clever enough to say anything but the truth that God has been calling me to give some tough answers to things I have never thought were questions before. Do I care what anyone thinks about me wearing only dresses? Not a chance. Not now. I pray the Lord reveals what He has for you from His word & that you delight in following after Him in the process.A mom I have been wearing only dresses for about 2 years. The year or two before that I would wear them a lot when we left the house. I have always felt more comfortable in jumper style dresses than in jeans or slacks. I never did wear shorts in public as an adult. I grew up in the 70's and early 80's and can see now how wrong my motives were in wearing tight jeans. (I would never wear short dresses as a teen even when they were in style, but my jeans were just as bad!) Back then I wanted to catch men's eyes, now I know that is a sinful way to act. I started really looking at a lot of areas in my life and praying about where I needed to change. I have not been purposely immodest since I have been married, but the Lord showed me things in my life that could be seen by others differently than how I was perceiving myself. I needed to be different than the world. This has been true in other areas besides the way I dress. The Lord has been working in many new ways in my life. Another reason for my wearing dresses has to do with an inward attitude. I have not been very submissive in our marriage. I was always head strong and my dh allowed me to be. I read about one woman's reason for wearing only dresses that really spoke to me (either on this site or in one of the magazines I get). She said that she wear dresses to remind her of who wears the pants in the family. I have to admit, I still struggle with this one, but I am getting better! When I first started wearing dresses two years ago I asked my dh about it, he didn't care one way or the other. Now, he thinks that modest dresses are right because they are not revealing like jeans and T-shirts can be. I have also noticed that when I am out shopping with the dc or alone that men treat me with more respect. The only problem I have had with wearing dresses only is the wind here can create some quite difficult situations. Dress past my knees could cause some embarrassing moments. But I solved that problem this year when I made myself some new jumpers by making them even longer, down to my ankles. Now even on the windiest day I don't have to hold my dress down. I hope this has been some help for you. I pray that the Lord will show you what is right for your family. A mom "A woman shall not wear anything that pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman's garment, for all who do so are an abomination to the Lord your God." Deuteronomy 22:5 (NKJV) Some people argue that this is from the Old Testament and so is no longer relevant. However, it does not simply say that a woman should not wear a man's clothes; it is called an ABOMINATION. God does not change. What was an abomination to Him still is. I agree that this verse deals with cross-dressing! The question is whether our definition of what consititutes "cross-dressing" is accurate! In our culture, we will accept a woman dressing like a man. Much of women's clothing is almost indistinguishable from a man's. In our culture, it's acceptable for a woman's clothing to look pretty much like a man's. Yet, most people are bothered by a man wearing a dress. The Bible calls ANY "cross-dressing" an abomination. One reason that many people don't like the idea of a woman wearing dresses only is because women should be allowed to wear what a man can wear. Our society does not like to acknowledge any differences between the sexes, and this thinking has crept into the church. The Bible is clear, however, in both the Old and New Testaments, that women and men were created with different roles. Some people would say that pants are not something that pertains only to a man. They are now unisex in the eyes of most people. But our God has said that there are differences between the genders, which should be reflected in our clothing. Dresses/skirts are still seen as distinctly feminine, which is why someone would be shocked if a man wore them. It's funny that not that many years ago it was shocking when feminists pushed for women to be allowed to wear pants. It's amazing how society's views have changed over the years. What was once an abomination in society's eyes is now accepted, along with many other things. Christendom, in general, has gone down the same path, though a little more slowly. There is also a modesty issue involved. Women's pants are often immodest in the way that they cling. Some men's pants are as well, but this is much more common with women. Women tend to be more curvaceous, and their pants are designed to be closer-fitting. Honestly, that is often the only thing that makes a woman's pants any different from a man's! So, you can also cause an eye trap for men. I hope that I do not come across as judgmental. I have not even been "dresses only" for a year yet. I have gone through most of the stages that Christians are in with regard to the issue. Here is the story of how I came to be dresses only. The first thing that I was convicted of was the need to be modest. About a year and a half ago, my husband and I came to feel that it was immodest to be wearing shorts that exposed the thigh. I had shorts that were about mid-thigh at the time. I was also in the early months of pregnancy. So, I tried to find knee-length shorts in maternity and had no luck. So, I bought maternity jeans and cut off the legs and hemmed them. About the same time, we also came to see that bathing suits were extremely immodest. You're showing the same amount of skin whether it's a bathing suit at the beach or a spaghetti strap top and short skirt at church on Sunday. So, we decided that I would no longer wear a bathing suit around others. We visited family in Hawaii, and my husband went swimming with a T-shirt on top. I sat on the beach. At 5 months pregnant, my suit wouldn't have fit anyway! Around that time (still a year and a half ago), we considered the idea of dresses only. I had come across some articles dealing with this topic. The main thing that spoke to us was Deuteronomy 22:5. "A woman shall not wear anything that pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman's garment, for all who do so are an abomination to the Lord your God." I left the decision up to my husband, and he said that he felt pants were okay. He felt that they were now culturally accepted as being okay for females to wear. So, I could wear them too. That's about how I felt, so I wasn't too bothered about the decision. Neither one of us was ready to be that different and didn't seek the Lord very earnestly about it. We were wanting to be convinced that pants were okay. Then, a year ago, I became dresses only. This was 6 months after my husband's previous decision. We discussed it again and came to a very different conclusion. We decided that dresses/skirts are still seen as distinctly feminine. Pants are now in the "unisex" category, though historically they have been seen as men's clothing in the Western world. We were no longer comfortable with my dressing in clothing that was not distinctly feminine. Wearing dresses/skirts all the time makes a few things clear immediately. It makes it clear that we are feminine and proud of it. Many people can share stories of people coming up to them and their family (especially with many daughters in dresses) and saying that they must be Christians. It strengthens our claims that men and women are different when we recognize that in our dress, as opposed to dressing to look like a man. I have been dresses only for just over a year now. At this point, I wouldn't feel comfortable stepping outside my front door for a minute wearing a pair of pants. I have become very used to my new clothes. I have found that I can also do just about anything in them. I've shoveled deep snow, raked leaves, and carried heavy boxes when moving among other things all with an ankle-length skirt. I do tend to look a little dressier than I did before. Most women when they wear something remotely feminine tend to look dressed up in this day and age, because it's not too common. I tend to wear a plain blue skirt (sort of like I would a denim skirt) with various tops or a flower print skirt with solid top for everyday. I enjoy looking feminine, and my husband enjoys it as well. A mom I have been a believer for over 20 years. We have always tried to look to the Lord for wisdom and guidance whenever a situation comes up where we need direction. The one area where I have always struggled in was the area of dresses only. My husband did not insist on my wearing dresses all the time. I was always much more conservative than my friends and I thought that I was "modest" enough. I usually avoided getting into this controversial issue because I know how divisive it can be. Over a year ago, my daughter Kristin (12 at the time) came to me with the scripture from Deuteronomy 22:5 "A woman shall not wear man's clothing nor shall a man put on a woman's clothing; for whoever does these things is an abomination to the Lord your God". She looked up abomination which means "showing extreme hatred for". She felt very strongly that her clothing did not come into line with God was showing her in the scriptures. How convicting for me. We discussed some of the things she had in her closet. They did not meet the new criteria God had shown her. We removed some items from her wardrobe but to be perfectly honest I did not want to change and did not share her deeper conviction. What a mistake. Over the next year we both began to slip back into our old dressing habits. In late August, a young lady came to our home to demonstrate some cutlery. As she walked up the walkway, her attire was most inappropriate. Knowing that the appointment was going to be a little long and that my husband was due home any time I asked her if she would mind going home to change and put on something more appropriate. (She had a Victorian era corset for a top, a slip for a skirt, etc.) She left. I did not think she was going to return. After she left, God began to speak to me and let me know that my attire was just as offensive in HIS eyes as hers was to me. What conviction. I immediately recalled the incident with my daughter over a year ago and felt so convicted. Realizing my error, I decided to examine more closely what the scripture says and OBEY it. Something I should have done along time ago. Surprisingly, the lady came back and had changed. How humbling for me. Here I was a complete stranger and she was willing to change to accommodate me. How much more should I be willing to change when asked by the living God? After a study of the scriptures I determined to completely alter my wardrobe as well as that of my daughters. I began with my daughter who was now (13 1/2) and went an explained what God had shown me. She was happy but a little reluctant to completely jump in again. She said that when she came to me a year ago I had convinced her that it wasn't necessary. How convicting. My mistake coming back again. I repented to her and asked her forgiveness for disobeying the word of God and HIS work in her life. We began to study the scriptures together on this issue. She still wanted to obey the sciptures but was finding it a lot more difficult this time around. Thankfully, she did not take very long. Within a week or so, she was on board and helping me work with the younger girls on their wardrobe. This has been a great benefit to our relationship. My daughter realized thru this that her friendships were taking a higher priority in her decisions that she realized. She recognized that God must be her first source of direction and not others. We are very cautious about friendships with our children and I would never have guessed that this was happening. I am thankful also that God was able to get a hold of my heart. I must admit I struggled with the same issues as well. Not many people in my circle share this conviction and that was part of my struggle. I was humbled by my daughter's ability to see what God was saying and obey much more quickly than I was. God needs to be our source of wisdom and instruction. I desire my house to be built in accordance to the scripture from Proverbs 24 which says "by wisdom a house is built, and by understanding it is established; And by knowledge the rooms are filled with all precious and pleasant riches." I am grateful to the Lord for HIS wisdom and direction which gave my daughter understanding so that HE could get to my heart. A mom Up until the time I met my husband 14 13½ years ago, I wore pants and dresses. When I met my hubby and we started "seeing each other", he said that he would prefer it if I didn't wear pants. I never wore another pair of pants again and got rid of them all. I was wearing dresses every day anyway as I was a legal secretary (so Saturday was really the only day I would wear pants). We married exactly 6 months from the day we met (our 13th anniversary is next month!). I have not put on a pair of pants in those 13+ years and I do not own any. I am so pleased to have two daughters to dress in dresses. They both love to wear dresses and skirts. I just pulled out my skirts and dresses from my skinny days and some of them fit my oldest daughter for which I am so thrilled as it was so hard to find clothes for her. I can honestly say that when I first started being "dresses only" over 13 years ago that it was not a personal conviction, just doing it to please my hubby. I can now say that it is a personal conviction of mine. I cannot really say exactly when the transition happened, but I love being feminine and looking like a lady! A mom Well, I have slowly been making this switch. I have to say that until I started coming to this site, I was dresses at church events only. I loved my jeans. My dh loved me in my jeans. However, over the past year we would discuss something that one of you here would post. While I was on bed rest this past spring I ordered Dr. Davis' tape on modest clothing. INSIGHTFUL! I then became dresses only outside of the house. This fall, I had started feeling as though I am a bad testimony to God when I check the mail (across the street) or answer the door in jeans. I actually stopped checking the mail & coming to the door if I was wearing pants. Funny though it may seem I would verbally beat myself up over wearing pants & what kind of message I was sending. I had decided that when the last of my jeans got a hole that needed to be dealt with then the pants would get tossed. That was the day I read the post by a lady on the message board. When I had sat down I couldn't even feel the hole. When I stood up it was more than an inch across. That was it, I got up & tossed all the pants I had. BTW, I started my dd out as dresses only from the day she was born. She won't have the same issues with her attire that I do. AT least that is my goal. As a side note, those who are thinking about changing your wardrobe to dresses only here are some interesting things I have noticed. *Men look at my face, NOT my chest *My Dh & my DS tell me how pretty I look (so did an elderly guy at church) *I have more room to maneuver while being modest doing so *I feel like a Lady, not just a woman, but an old fashioned LADY *People are more willing to help me when I am in a dress *People take me more seriously in a dress Those are all reasons enough that I would not want my dd to wear pants. The most important reason of all is that dresses please God! A mom | ||
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